Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Turning into stone.

Music by Phantogram.

Wow. I don’t know that I even have the words to describe the past week. It’s been an incredibly fun ride, to put simply.

This gay cruise to Mexico that I went on was a fantastic idea, and I’m so happy that Bryan and I were both able to make it happen. My favorite thing about this vacation was the people we met. Since I was one of less than 20 women onboard a ship with 2,000 gay men, I obviously got a lot of attention. The guys had no problem talking to me, since I guess you could say I wasn’t a threat to them at all, and there was no fear of rejection. Because of all the attention, Bryan and I were able to meet so many awesome guys. We created a core group of about five, and we spent every night out on the dance floor forgetting about our lives off the ship. We drank too much, laughed too hard, and danced until we were dripping sweat. We built relationships based purely on how we interacted with people on the ship, not by what occupation or position we held in the real world or how much money we made or how old we were. When it came time to get off the ship, we exchanged information and intend on keeping these friendships going. There’s even possibly a reunion cruise in the future.

On top of attention I got from just the guys on the ship, I also had the good fortune to meet almost all of the performers for the cruise. The first night on board, Bryan and I went to a comedy show for Dixie Longate (hilarious). She asked about the lesbians on the cruise, to which I emphatically called out where I was. In front of me, I noticed another woman that looked to be in my age range that I had seen earlier. She also raised her hand, so I introduced myself after the show because I thought she was pretty. Turns out, it was comedian Erin Foley. I didn’t realize where I’d seen her before until the next day, but that night, she hung out with us on the back deck of the ship for a few hours. Throughout the cruise, we got to hang out with her more and more and ended up meeting a lot of the performers through that connection. Comedian Poppy Champlin also included me in some material, and it got a good laugh at her show. I had the chance to have dinner with her as well, which was very nice. All of these people were just great to hang out with, and I’m happy to call them friends now. Comedians, cabaret singers, Broadway stars… who knew.

An odd thing about the trip that didn’t affect me quite as profoundly as it did Bryan though, was essentially the casual sex. Everyone on that ship had a different motivation for being there, don’t get me wrong. There were those who wanted to make connections in love, some wanted to network, some needed a break from their day-to-day hetero world, and some, yes, were in it for the amount of hook-ups they could make happen. Each to their own, I wasn’t there to judge. The point is, it struck Bryan as odd that a lot of these guys could be so flippant about sex. Maybe I’m jaded. Maybe I’ve been in too many relationships or non-relationships with physical aspects about them. Maybe in the military, I’ve seen a lot of sexual drama in friends and coworkers. Bryan thought it was so odd that someone could sleep with essentially a complete stranger and have it followed by sometimes zero expectations of friendship or more. This stuff happens all the time in real life on land, but it was made odd by the fact that we were stuck on a ship together for seven days making this stuff happen.

So anyway, as far as the project is concerned, I spent the week absolutely absorbed in living moment to moment in that tiny bubble of a ship. I only meditated a few times, but I spent more than a few nights drunkenly contemplating the world and human interaction on the balcony while staring at the stars. So I feel as though, while I didn’t follow my rules, I still tried to be mindful of everything happening around me.


This vacation also opened up the avenues of creativity for my brain. Being around all the performers and witnessing their incredible talents on the piano or with their vocals alone, it rekindled my desire to be involved in music. I’ve decided to go look for a cheap keyboard and maybe a loop pedal or some simple equipment to go with it. I want to start exploring that world of music, not just the guitar and ukulele.

Alright, done being boring for the day. I’m currently on the last leg of the trip back home, so I’m exhausted and jet lagged already.

-Jamie

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